{"id":2605,"date":"2022-05-13T10:54:22","date_gmt":"2022-05-13T09:54:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/?p=2605"},"modified":"2022-05-13T10:54:22","modified_gmt":"2022-05-13T09:54:22","slug":"thought-for-the-week-how-to-influence-with-a-single-question","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/2022\/05\/13\/thought-for-the-week-how-to-influence-with-a-single-question\/","title":{"rendered":"Thought for the Week \u2013 How to Influence with a Single Question?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"2607\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/2022\/05\/13\/thought-for-the-week-how-to-influence-with-a-single-question\/question\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/Question.png\" data-orig-size=\"361,384\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Question\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/Question.png\" class=\"wp-image-2607 alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/Question-282x300.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"190\" height=\"202\" srcset=\"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/Question-282x300.png 282w, https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/Question.png 361w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 190px) 100vw, 190px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Last week\u2019s Thought for the Week was \u201cWho is Your Biggest Influencer?\u201d\u00a0and I told you about mine and what a massive difference she made to my life.<\/p>\n<p><em>[You can find all previous posts here in my blog]<\/em><\/p>\n<p>When it comes to influencing others, how do you do that?<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Do you persuade?<\/li>\n<li>Do you Cajole?<\/li>\n<li>Do you believe you have to push people into doing things?<\/li>\n<li>Do you influence?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Because there&#8217;s a HUGE difference &#8211; not only between these ways of communicating, but more importantly in the outcomes you get.<\/p>\n<p>The thing is: a lot of people get the difference and a lot of people don&#8217;t, even if they believe they do.<\/p>\n<p>And, of course if you manage people, you have to ask them to do things that are part of their job description. And sometimes things that fall outside their job description.<\/p>\n<p>If someone says \u201cno\u201d to something you have asked them to do that is outside their JD, what then happens in your experience?<\/p>\n<p>If you are a business owner, you may need to ask a supplier to do something for you sooner than their usual delivery time. What is your experience of this?<\/p>\n<p>There may be a number of reasons why they have said no, including current workload.<\/p>\n<p>So, I&#8217;m going to ask some questions&#8230;.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>How do you feel when you have said &#8220;no&#8221; to something, then someone is trying to persuade you to do that?<\/li>\n<li>If that happens, how do you feel about that person afterwards?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Depending how they went about it, your level of trust in that person may have gone down!<\/p>\n<p>So, if they managed to persuade you, they may have got a quick win in that moment but have most likely lost your trust going forward, right?<\/p>\n<p>Then, what IS the difference when someone influences rather than persuades?<\/p>\n<p><strong>The difference is subtle but the outcome is HUGE.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This is a topic I cover in depth in my programmes, so I&#8217;d like to give you just one powerful tip &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>If they say \u201cno\u201d, ask them this question:<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cI was really hoping you could help me with that. May I ask the reason you can\u2019t this time?<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Now, what\u2019s the difference between asking that and asking; <em>\u201cWhy can\u2019t you do it?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Asked this way, they are more likely to decide whether they can help you and that is influence!<\/p>\n<p>You may even think there is no difference and I have just worded it in a different way!<\/p>\n<p>The difference is that firstly, it is genuine. You have owned the request by saying you had hoped they could help you.<\/p>\n<p>Secondly, you showed them respect in the way you asked them about the reason they can\u2019t help.<\/p>\n<p>Which question do you believe they are most likely to reconsider?<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Asking \u201cWhy\u201d sounds judgemental and puts people on the defensive.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yes, it is an open question, but, for instance; if someone asked you; <em>\u201cWhy did you do it like that?\u201d <\/em>How would you feel?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">\u201cA single question can be more influential than a thousand statements.\u201d<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\">-Bo Bennett-<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em>[Author, Social Scientist, Business Owner, Screenwriter]<\/em><\/p>\n<p>As always, I will leave you\u00a0 with that thought!<\/p>\n<p>I would also like to invite you to book a<strong><span style=\"color: #333399;\"> <a style=\"color: #333399;\" href=\"https:\/\/calendly.com\/korinne\/30min\">Complimentary Consultation<\/a><\/span><\/strong> with me, where you can explore how you influence through your communication.<\/p>\n<p>With best wishes.<\/p>\n<p><strong><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><em>Korinne<\/em>\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Korinne Le Page<\/strong><br \/>\n<strong>Thrive Coaching &amp; Training<\/strong><br \/>\nP.S. Ask me about the next<strong><span style=\"color: #008080;\"> <a style=\"color: #008080;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.CommunicationCode.co.uk\">Communication Code Group Programme<\/a><\/span><\/strong><br \/>\n<strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600;\"><a style=\"color: #ff6600;\" href=\"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/\">www.Thrive-Coaching.biz<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Last week\u2019s Thought for the Week was \u201cWho is Your Biggest Influencer?\u201d\u00a0and I told you about mine and what a massive difference she made to my life. [You can find all previous posts here in my blog] When it comes to influencing others, how do you do that? Do you persuade? Do you Cajole? Do&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":176728601,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_crdt_document":"","advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[97],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2605","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorised"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pgKEDA-G1","amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2605","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/176728601"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2605"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2605\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2608,"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2605\/revisions\/2608"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2605"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2605"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thrive-coaching.biz\/test.thrive-coaching.biz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2605"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}