When have you learned more from a disagreement than from an agreement?
Last time, we explored “From Fuel to Flow: How Communication Creates Momentum”. If you missed it, you can catch up here.
We love conversations that flow. They’re energising, effortless, full of momentum.
What happens when the flow of conversation stalls?
When our conversations meet a moment of friction: disagreement, hesitation, a pause that feels heavy?
Friction Isn’t Failure
In a world where speed is celebrated, silence, hesitation, or disagreement can feel uncomfortable. Yet friction isn’t a breakdown – it’s a breakthrough waiting to happen.
Friction forces us to slow down, listen closer, and notice what lies beneath the surface.
Too often, we treat friction as failure. Yet friction is not the end of connection – it’s the test of it. Like sandpaper, friction shapes and refines. It slows us down so we can see what really matters.
Think of it like this:
- Flow creates movement and carries us forward.
- Friction creates depth and an opportunity to grow.
Think about your most meaningful relationships – whether at work, in your family, or with friends. The chances are, they grew stronger in tough moments, where honesty was tested and trust was built, rather than in more challenging situations.
The leaders, colleagues, and friends we most remember are rarely the ones who avoided conflict. They are the ones who leaned into it with curiosity, patience, and courage.
How to Turn Friction into Connection
This week, I invite you to try these three practical ways to welcome friction instead of fearing it:
- Stay Curious, Not Defensive. Ask: “Tell me more about how you see it?”
- Acknowledge the moment: “I sense some tension here – could we explore it?”
- Seek the Deeper ‘Why’. Go beyond positions and uncover what truly matters, i.e., the underlying need, value, or concern that really matters to the person, or to yourself.
The Gift of Friction
When flow meets friction, connection deepens – and the conversations that follow endure.
Without friction, wheels spin.
Without resistance, muscles don’t grow.
Without challenge, conversations remain shallow.
The next time flow turns to friction, see it as an invitation rather than a roadblock. It may just be the spark that deepens trust and sets the stage for real momentum.
So, let’s not just celebrate conversations that flow. Let’s learn to value the ones that stretch us. That’s where the real growth happens.
“In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.”
– Albert Einstein –
As always, I love hearing your thoughts. If you’d like to arrange a conversation anytime, let’s do that!
With warmest wishes,
Korinne Le Page
Thrive Coaching & Training – Empowering You to Thrive!
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