Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Mind-boggling Fortitude” about the incredible achievements that human beings make through sheer mindset, courage determination and fortitude. You can see this and all of my previous blogs here in my blog.

If I ask you what is the most amazing thing you have achieved so far in your life, what would that be?

When I ask people that same question on training workshops, often they struggle to think of anything. And yet they find it easier to say what that have not achieved that they think they should have!

Why is that?

Because many people are conditioned to be humble and don’t want to appear “full of themselves” and things like that.

Of course, humility is a good quality to have and many of the most successful people are actually quite humble about their achievements. At the same time, they seem to quietly acknowledge them while playing them down a little don’t they!

There is a very subtle difference between playing down what we have achieved and beating ourselves up about what we have not yet achieved – right?

Did you see what I did there? Yes, I emphasised the “Yet”!

So, a little shift in our mindset can change everything – and then setting our intentions.

If you look back on your life and what you have achieved, what was your intention leading up to that?

How did you put that intention into words?

Sometimes people interpret their intention into some kind of image or vision, especially if they are more of a visual person (if you know about Neuro Linguistic Programming – NLP – you will get that).

For others, it could be a piece of music that reminds them of their intention.

Here’s a definition from the Dictionary:

What is the true meaning of intention?

“An intention is idea that you plan (or intend) to carry out. If you mean something, it’s an intention. Your goal, purpose, or aim is your intention. It’s something you mean to do, whether you pull it off or not”.

So, your intention will be like a goal – at the same time, your intention / goal has to be very meaningful to you, like an anchor that keeps you on track towards where you want to get to.

Like Bob Wieland (who I spoke about last week), how can we achieve such amazing feats in our lives?

We know that it is absolutely possible when we put our mind to it through setting our own powerful intention!

 

“Intentions compressed into words enfold magical power”

-Deepaki Chopra-

[Medical Doctor and writer]

 

If you’d like to book a FREE consultation with me – you can choose your slot HERE 

Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” and you can download it HERE

So, I hope you have a great week and achieve something amazing, no matter how big or how tiny!

With best wishes,

Korinne Le Page

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Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Reading the Room” about how the most impactful people are those who listen and read the room. They may say just one thing in a meeting and yet that one thing is the most powerful thing anyone has to say!

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

One of the most impressive people I ever met was Bob Wieland who did a talk when I was living and running training courses in Barbados.  Bob is a Vietnam war veteran who lost both legs to a mortar mine in 1969. He lost them right up to hip level. Of course, we know of many more who have suffered such losses, past and present, some losing all four limbs.

Despite his horrific injuries, Bob became inspired to do a marathon and is the only double amputee to finish the challenging Kona, Hawaiian Ironman race without a wheelchair. He “ran” across America on his hands, taking 3 years, eight months and six days to travel from coast-to-coast. And, over his lifetime Bob has finished many marathons.

He spoke about those who were with him on the race (most able-bodied) and how some of them dropped out. At the same time, he was so humble about that explaining that everyone had their own reasons and he had so much respect for them.

Chatting to Bob after the talk, I was struck by how humble he was, and yet he overcame adversity with such incredible grace and courage. He also finished the NYC Marathon on 98 hours and you can see him cross the finish line here: https://youtu.be/csBt2_L5yTc

I don’t know about you, but I find this such a mind-blowingly impressive tribute to human beings and what we can achieve through sheer mindset, courage determination and fortitude.

What does this tell us as we go about our day?

“Like tiny seeds with potent power to push through tough ground and become mighty trees, we hold innate reserves of unimaginable strength. We are resilient.”
-Catherine DeVrye, The Gift of Nature-

[Best-selling author, winner of Australian Executive Woman of the Year and a Thought Leader]

 So, I hope you have a great week and achieve something wonderful, no matter how big or small.

With best wishes,

Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” and you can download it HERE

If you’d like to book a FREE consultation with me – you can choose your slot HERE 

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Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “NO Time to Think” which was about why taking time to check in with ourselves is so important because how we think about ourselves affects how we communicate with others. People thrive in a thinking environment!

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

When you’re in a meeting, do you notice who is doing most of the talking? Is it always the same person, or people?

They may be making some excellent points – the thing is though how does that enhance communication for everyone else at that meeting?

If they are just talking, are they actually listening to others? Just saying!

This can create a wall, a block for the others to speak. The consequence of that is that decisions will probably be made by the more dominant speakers in the room and everyone else has to live with those, unless they manage to speak up!

I was in a meeting recently and was observing … there was one person doing most of the talking and dominating the conversation. Let’s call them Person A.

Someone was trying to present to the group (Person B) and A kept talking over them. Not only was A talking over them, they were jumping the gun and telling B what they should be doing when B hadn’t been able to get to that point yet!

When B spoke up saying they would like to finish and get to their point, A said (quite abruptly) that they wanted to be able to talk too and gave B a piercing look.

Well, of course everyone can have their say – at the same time, if A had just listened and waited for B to finish before talking, it would have been a very different conversation.

I’m sure that you have experienced similar situations and you may even realise that you have been Person A at some point!

The most impactful people are those who listen and read the room. They may say just one thing in a meeting and yet that one thing is the most powerful thing anyone has said!

‘We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.

-Epictetus-

[Greek philosopher who spent his youth as a slave in Rome before gaining freedom after the death of Nero, under whom he served until around 60 AD].

I’d like to share this FREE Checklist with you; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” and you can download HERE

And, if you’d like to take time to think with me, I invite you to book a FREE consultation – you can choose your slot HERE 

So, I hope this Thought for the Week has inspired you, even in a small way.

Have a great week and I’ll be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

Korinne Le Page

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Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Time to Think” which was about how important it is to give others time to think, particularly in our very busy and distracting World, because people thrive in a thinking environment.

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

Because listening and giving people time to think is so key to communication, I’d like to continue with this theme this week.

One of the biggest complaints in our modern society is being overcommitted and overstretched. Ask people at a social gathering how they are and the stock answer is likely to be; “super busy,” “crazy busy” or “insanely busy.” Few seem to say they are just “fine” anymore!

When people aren’t super busy at work, they are crazy busy exercising, entertaining or taking their kids to sport or dancing classes. Or maybe they are insanely busy playing sport themselves, tracing their genealogy, clearing out their shed or scrolling through social media!

Sometimes people actually find any excuse they can to keep busy so they can avoid taking time out to just think. And research has shown in 11 experiments involving over 700 people, that the majority reported finding it unpleasant to be alone in a room with their thoughts for just 6 to 15 minutes.

Why do you think that is? Is it because we tend to dwell on what’s wrong in our lives? What preys on our minds, when we aren’t keeping busy?

And until there is resolution, or at least some kind of understanding or acceptance, these thoughts reverberate in our heads.

So, when we are talking about taking time to think when we are alone, we are communicating with ourselves! Could you catch yourself having negative thoughts and intentionally turn these around into positive ones?

For instance; if you are dwelling on having too much work and not enough time, could you instead focus on what you have already achieved?

This self-communication is so important because how we think about ourselves affects how we communicate with those around us.

Studies further suggest that not giving ourselves time to reflect, impairs our ability to empathise with others …

“The more in touch with my own feelings and experiences, the richer and more accurate are my guesses of what passes through another person’s mind,”

-Giancarlo Dimaggio-

[Psychiatrist with the Centre for Metacognitive Interpersonal Therapy in Rome, who studies the interplay of self-reflection and empathy].

If you’d like to take time to think with me, I invite you to book a FREE consultation. You can choose your slot HERE 

So, I hope this Thought for the Week has inspired you, even a little bit and I will sign off on that note.

Have a great week and I’ll be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

Korinne Le Page – Thrive Coaching & Training

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Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Curiously Listening” which was about listening to understand what another person is really trying to tell us, rather than listening with the intent to reply.

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

As you have probably gathered by now, I have a thing about listening!

I’m not perfect and like any other human, I can be forgiven for those times when I don’t listen as well as I could because I’m stressed or whatever. What all of us can do is to listen as well as we possibly can and strive to be a better listener.

And here’s the thing; when someone is talking to us and we are already thinking about our reply, how well are we actually listening?

If only every citizen of the World listened to each other with empathy and compassion, imagine how different it would be!

Some may ask why it’s so important to listen? I would ask them how they feel when someone really listens to them and gives them space and time to think.

And that’s a real gift.

In one of my earlier blogs, I mentioned a book that I read when I was training to be a coach; “Time to Think: by Nancy Kline.

How can you create and be in a thinking environment where everybody thrives? Here are 10 ways of being with others that generates creativity, good thinking, motivation, open-mindedness towards each other and trust …

Ten components of a thinking environment: –

1. Give your full attention and listen. If you give attention and take a genuine interest in what the person thinks and will say next, they will think better around you than they would if you interrupt them or listen only in order to reply.

2. Create an environment of equality. If you regard the person who is thinking as your thinking equal, regardless of any power differential between you, they will think better around you, than if you see yourself as better than, or less than, they are.

3. Ease. If you are at ease inside yourself, regardless of the degree of urgency and rush outside you, people will think better and faster around you than if you are in a hurry yourself.

4. Appreciation. If you genuinely appreciate people 5 times more than you give feedback to them, they will think more clearly and imaginatively around you than if you focus on their faults.

5. Encouragement. If you encourage people, build with them the courage to go to the unexplored edge of their thinking, by championing their excellence, they will think better around you than if you compete with them.

6. Feelings. If you welcome the expression of peoples’ feelings, and are relaxed in the face of their tears, or anger or fear, they will think better around you than if you race in some way to anaesthetise them.

7. Information. If you offer accurate and complete information to people and if you show respect for them facing what they have been denying, they will think better around you than if you collude with their assumption that what is true is not true, or that what is not true is.

8. Diversity. If you’re interested in the diversity between you and others, the differences both in your group ideas, group identities and cultures, they will think better around you, than if you indicate (however subtly) that being just like you is best.

9. Incisive Questions. If you can ask people an incisive question, one that replaces an untrue limiting assumption with a true, liberating one, they will think better around you, than if you abandon them to limiting assumptions and beliefs.

10. Place. If you can prepare the place where you and they think together, so that it says to them; “you matter”, they will think better around you, than if you allow the place to be intimidating, inaccessible or culturally and aesthetically barren.

It’s from that quality of thinking that people make the best decisions and, even if you only do ONE of these things, you will be improving peoples’ thinking. And you will see that people are grateful for any one of them, any chance they get!

On a Leadership Programme with Thrive Coaching & Training, we will immerse ourselves in these components.

“How far can this person go in their own productive, original thinking before they need mine?”
-Nancy Kline-

[President of Time to Think, an international leadership development and coaching company. She is also a published author and public speaker].

If you’d like time to think with me, I invite you to book a FREE consultation. You can choose your slot HERE 

So, I hope this Thought for the Week has inspired you, even a little bit and I will sign off on that note.

Have a great week and I’ll be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Expectations for Today” which was about how our expectations are at the root of so many misunderstandings.

You can see all of my previous blogs HERE

So, if peoples’ expectations are at the root of so many misunderstandings, I believe that another huge barrier is when we don’t listen well!

We are all human and there are times when we don’t listen as well as we could for a number of reasons such as; our mind being on other things, we aren’t interested in what the other person is saying, we think it’s irrelevant to us, we have a very short attention span, or whatever.

When at a party socialising, we are likely to communicate differently to when we are at work or with clients, right? And in social situations, people are often talking over each other and not listening that attentively to each other.

“There’s a lot of difference between listening and hearing.”
-G.K. Chesterton-

[English writer and philosopher]

“The word ‘listen’ contains the same letters as the word ‘silent’.”
-Alfred Brendel-

[Austrian classical pianist, poet, author, composer and lecturer]

So, in what kind of situations should we be better listeners then?

I’m sure you can think of many situations and don’t need me to tell you! Essentially, I think most people would like to be better listeners in general and many believe they are already great listeners. Let me ask you a few questions …

1. In conversations with colleagues at work, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much of the talking do you usually do?
2. In meetings, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much of the talking do you usually do?
3. If someone comes to you for advice, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much of the talking do you usually do?
4. If you are giving someone a performance appraisal, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much of the talking do you usually do?

So, you will see in which situations you do most of the talking.

Now, replace the word ‘talking’ with ‘listening’ and ask yourself the same questions.

What did you notice?

“Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply. When we listen with curiosity, we don’t listen with the intent to reply. We listen for what’s behind the words.”

-Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart-

If you’d like to explore this further for your team or yourself, I would like to invite you to book a FREE consultation with me. You can choose your slot HERE 

So, I hope this Thought for the Week has inspired you, even a little bit and I will sign off on that note.

Have a great week and I’ll be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

P.S. Download this FREE Checklist: “10 Mistakes that Could be Stopping You from Being a Really Good Communicator“:

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Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “The Acceptance Dilemma” which was about how we receive thanks and compliments and it is not easy for everyone.

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

To many people, Valentine’s Day is perceived as a commercial ploy to get us to part us with our well-earned dosh and can put us under pressure with partners – especially if we don’t share the same opinion about what’s expected!

Whether or not you acknowledge Valentine’s Day, it can be an opportunity for connection and communication (and not all about romance).

When you think about it, so much depends on our expectations doesn’t it!

And this is where so many people come unstuck in their communication.

I mentioned last week that I had a realisation about a compliment being a gift when I was training to be a counsellor years ago … around the same time, I learned about expectations too.

When we meet a new person for the first time, they would know very little about us, let alone about our expectations because that’s so personal.

We know that first impressions are so important and we make up our mind about someone in the first few seconds of meeting them.

So, how much are these first impressions to do with how we expect others to greet us when we first meet them?

For instance; do we expect them to shake our hand? Would we judge them for not shaking our hand?

After the pandemic, we know that people have different views about shaking hands. How do we communicate that?

If we don’t want to shake hands, we have to communicate that in an amiable or even jokey way don’t we! Anyway, that’s just one example of how we communicate our expectations.

When we start a new job or role, we want to know from the outset what’s expected of us don’t we. How can we get started if we aren’t clear?

When another person speaks and behaves in a certain way, we may feel disappointed. But how would they know about our expectations if we haven’t told them?

I don’t know about you; I have had to check in with myself to see what my expectations are of others and keep an open mind. So often, expectations are at the root of misunderstandings.

So that’s food for thought for you today! Just gently notice what your expectations are of others as you go through your day and see how this improves your communication with them.

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.”

-Donald Miller-

[Author, public speaker, and business owner]

If you’d like to explore this further for your team or yourself, I would like to invite you to book a FREE consultation with me. You can choose your slot HERE 

Have a great week and I’ll be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

Korinne Le Page, Thrive Coaching & Training

P.S. Download this FREE Checklist: “10 Mistakes that Could be Stopping You from Becoming a Really Good Communicator”

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Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “The Balance of Thanks” which was about how we show our thanks and appreciation.

You can see all of my previous blogs HERE

Last week, I left you with this quote …

“When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed.”
– Maya Angelou –

[World-renowned author best known for her unique and pioneering autobiographical writing style]

So, following on from last week, I have been giving a lot of thought around how we accept gratefully, i.e., appreciation from others, gifts and compliments etc!

For example; when someone thanks us verbally, in a genuine way, for something we have done for them, we can tell that they really do appreciate it. We will feel happy they are happy and will probably respond with a simple “You’re welcome” or similar.

That will feel right for many, but not for everyone (for instance; many more tend to be more reserved and / or less confident and may even feel embarrassed in situations like that – even if they are happy the other person is happy!)

Going back to my 20’s (a long time ago now and my memory still serves me well!) I used to feel embarrassed when someone gave me a compliment. It’s only when I trained to be a counsellor that I realised that a compliment is actually a gift. People take the time and trouble to pay us a compliment and they don’t have to!

In fact, as we get busier and busier in our daily lives, people often forget to give compliments and show appreciation, even if they intended to.

So, it can be quite rare to receive a compliment, or for someone to go out of their way to show their gratitude and appreciation. And that is a real gift and also needs to be accepted with gratitude.

If someone gives us a physical gift, it’s unlikely we would give it back or cast it aside in front of them, so why would we do that with a compliment?

“Accepting a compliment isn’t a violation of humility. It’s an expression of gratitude for an act of kindness.

Deflecting undermines the gesture—and discourages them from praising others. Even if you’re struggling to believe it, saying thanks shows that you value their words”.

-Adam Grant-

[Organizational psychologist and bestselling author who explores the science of motivation, generosity, original thinking, and rethinking. Adam Grant has been Wharton’s top-rated professor for 7 straight years]

• How do you show your gratitude to others?
• How do you receive thanks and appreciation?
• How do you receive gifts?
• How do you receive compliments?
• When was the last time you gave someone a compliment?

If you haven’t already, l would like to invite you to book a free consultation with me if you’d like to explore this further for your team or yourself. Choose your slot HERE 

Have a great week and I’ll be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “The Anchor of Trust” which was about how the bonds we have with people in our lives are anchored around the level of Trust between us.

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

If you did the exercise last week about what anchors you to each of your relationships, whether with colleagues, professionally or personally, you will appreciate another really important area here is how we communicate appreciation and gratitude.

We are all different of course and where one person would have certain expectations around this, another would see things quite differently.

Saying “thank you” is simple enough – but how about saying it in a truly meaningful way? 

How do you show your gratitude to others?

• Through words such as “thank you”?
• Through actions and / or gestures?
• Through tokens of thanks, such as a card, chocolates or flowers?
• You don’t express as often as you would like to or think you should?

What means the most to you when someone thanks you?

For me, what means the most is when someone is genuine in their appreciation, like when they make eye contact, use gestures (such as placing a hand over their heart as they say thanks) and things like that.

Their non-verbal language means a lot to me, more than a gift.

It’s very interesting because how we like people to thank us may be different to what others expect, but unless we know them very well, how would we know?

It will also depend on what it is they did for us as well and the level of gratitude we feel. For instance, if they gave something up for us, we might want to replace it or make up for it in some way.

If in doubt about what to do, I believe the best place to start is by saying a genuine “thank you” (using their name and making eye contact) and why you appreciate what they did, said or whatever.

“The real gift of gratitude is that the more grateful you are, the more present you become.”
– Robert Holden –

[British psychologist, author, and broadcaster, who works in the field of positive psychology and well-being]

And not to forget the balance to giving thanks is how we receive them …

 “When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed.”
– Maya Angelou –

[World-renowned author best known for her unique and pioneering autobiographical writing style]

If you haven’t already, l invite you to book a free consultation with me if you’d like to explore this further. Choose your slot HERE 

I will leave you on that note and will post again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Challenge & Excitement” all about being creative and realistic about our strategy and goals whilst being exciting and stretching us!

You can see all of my blogs below.

So, by now, I am sure you will have a plan that you feel inspired by and anchored to, because that’s what we need as professionals isn’t it? To be anchored to a strategy in a fluid way that allows movement to go with the flow, whilst keeping us steady on our course.

I like to use this metaphor of an anchor too when it comes to our working and personal relationships and how we interact with each other.

The ‘anchor’ is whatever the relationship is about and what holds us together. And of course, the degree of this will vary between more professional and personal relationships.

Have you thought about what anchors you in each of your relationships?

• Loved ones
• Social friends
• Colleagues
• Team
• Clients
• Service partners, etc.

How we interact with each of these people in our lives, will depend on what anchors us to each other and the level of trust between us.

It’s an interesting exercise to think about this level of trust you have with each person on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being high).

Then think about how you communicate differently depending on that level of trust?

I’d love to know what you think so please let me know!

l invite you to book a free consultation with me if you’d like to explore this further. Choose your slot HERE 

“When the Trust Account is high, communication is easy, instant and effective”
-Stephen Covey-

I will leave you on that note and will post again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,
Korinne