Thought for the Week – Unmasking the Communication Illusion

unmask-communication-illusion

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “From Virtual Barriers to Real Connections” which was all about overcoming virtual barriers to achieve effective communication skills and using technology to enhance virtual communication.

You can see this and all of my previous blogs below.

What happens when Communication goes ‘south’?

The majority of our waking hours (roughly 70%), are dedicated to interacting with others, so when it goes wrong, it can result in conflicts and feelings of frustration.

And let’s face it, many of us have never been taught effective communication techniques that produce the desired outcomes! Communication in general is not covered in most school curriculums, so we have to learn this as we go along.

I have been researching this with clients, people on my workshops and group coaching programme and asked these questions …

What exactly constitutes effective communication?

The successful exchange of information, ideas, thoughts, and feelings between individuals or groups. It involves transmitting a message in a way that ensures the intended meaning is accurately conveyed and understood by the recipient(s).

What are the key elements of effective communication?

Most of them said …

  • Clarity: Clear and concise messages successfully sharing information, ideas, and feelings with others.
  • Active Listening: As we looked at with “Listening to see and hear”.
  • Non-verbal communication: Body language and tone of voice.
  • Feedback: How we give and receive feedback.
  • Empathy: Stepping into someone’s shoes (different to sympathy).
  • Adaptability to different people’s needs – asking them what they need!
  • Conflict resolution: effective communication helps resolve conflict in a positive way (and can avoid it in the first place).

It’s all about connecting, understanding and achieving desired outcomes through friendly and meaningful interactions and I’m going to be writing more thoughts around each of the above over the coming weeks.

Effective communication is not solely about transmitting information; it is about establishing meaningful connections, fostering understanding, and achieving desired outcomes through clear and empathetic interaction.

What is effective communication NOT about?

Effective communication is NOT just getting your point across to others quickly. It takes time to think, create a message, listen, understand and then take action.

It is extremely hard to do and takes lots of conscious thought and effort to frame, position and maintain.

I went to a presentation recently and the lady presenting was extremely knowledgeable. And yet she spoke so quickly and in a monotone voice that she lost most of us along the way. Some of us left wishing we had been able to take away more from the session.

I invite you to book a free call with me to see how you could master communication. Choose a time that best works for you HERE

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

George Bernard Shaw-

[Famous for his role in revolutionising comedic drama, a literary critic and a prominent British socialist.]

I will leave you with that thought and will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes for your success,
korinne-sig

Korinne Le Page

Thrive Coaching & TrainingEmpowering you to Thrive!

Thrive Web Site

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Thought for the Week – From Virtual Barriers to Real Connections

virtual-barriersLast week’s Thought for the Week was; “Listening to See & Hear” which was all about listening more in conversations than speaking, to be more effective communicators. You can see this and all of my previous blogs below.

So, my last thought was more about face-to-face conversations, but how do we listen to see and hear when we are on a virtual call or on the phone, which is how we communicate more and more these days?

Personally, I always prefer a face-to-face conversation to a virtual one wherever doable, and sometimes that’s just not possible.

And I’m seeing very successful professionals learn how to cross time, space, and culture barriers to communicate effectively and get great results.

The ‘communication rules’ have evolved over time, especially over the last 3 years and we have had to learn to navigate that.

And, actually it is more difficult for people to talk over each other on a virtual call isn’t it! We all look at the little lit-up square to see who is talking and we look at that person. So, if people talk over each other, it can get very confusing.

So, how do you know someone is listening to you and engaged while on a virtual call?

I’d like to give you a tip to show you are listening on a video call, you may already do this, but in case you aren’t, try looking into your camera. This gives the impression that you are making eye contact.

Now, of course, you will want to be looking at the person as well, so just make a point of looking into the camera when you can. When we are face-to-face, we wouldn’t stare at the other person anyway, we would make eye contact in a relaxed way!

If easier, you can move the chat windows to the centre of your screen so when you are looking away from the camera, it still appears that you are looking at them, rather than off to one side.

Other ways to overcome virtual barriers and improve communication: –

  1. Use non-verbal cues: Although virtual communication limits the use of body language, you can still use non-verbal cues like nodding or smiling to show engagement and agreement.
  2. Be clear and concise: In virtual communication, it’s important to be clear and concise to avoid misunderstandings. Make sure your message is brief, focused, and to the point.
  3. Practice active listening: Active listening involves paying attention to what the other person is saying and responding appropriately. It’s important to avoid multitasking or getting distracted during virtual calls.
  4. Use technology effectively: There are many tools available that can help improve virtual communication, such as screen sharing or chat functions. Familiarise yourself with the technology and use it effectively to enhance your virtual communication.
  5. Follow up: After virtual calls or meetings, it’s important to follow up with a summary or action items to ensure everyone is on the same page. This can help avoid miscommunications and improve collaboration.

Overall, overcoming virtual barriers requires adaptability, effective communication skills, and the use of technology to enhance virtual communication.

How about over the phone? Well, ditto mostly! Whilst we can’t look into a camera, we interpret much more than we realise through tone of voice. For example; can you ‘hear a smile’ on the phone? I think so because, when someone is smiling, their tone of voice sounds more positive.

I can also tell when someone is distracted when speaking on the phone, can you? They think we can’t see however we can hear they are less engaged by their tone of voice.

Experiment this week and I’d love to hear your feedback!

I invite you to book a free call with me to see how you could maximise virtual communication. Choose a time that best works for you HERE

“The true test of technology is not just how it works, but how it empowers people to do things they couldn’t before”

-Satya Nadella-

[CEO of Microsoft]

I will leave you with that thought and will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes for your success,

korinne-sig

Free Download: The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication

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Thought for the Week – Listening to See & Hear

listen-to-see-and-hear

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “The Power of Showing Up” about how we choose to be when we are around other people.

You can see this and all of my previous blogs HERE.

How we show up is all about communication isn’t it and how we connect with each other and it’s so much more than how we talk.

When I run Communication workshops, people often arrive thinking that it’s all about how they speak and they expect to learn tips and tricks around that. And then they realise that there is so much more to it than that.

And it is interesting how people believe they are good communicators because they talk a lot! But are they? What do you think?

Personally, I have found that the best communicators are actually speaking less than others, and yet they are taking it all in. And because they are not speaking, they are so much more attentive of what’s going on.

So, when they do speak, they have something valuable to say, or they may aske a really pertinent question to help clarify something that’s being discussed. 

“Most of the successful people I’ve known are the ones who do more listening than talking.”

-Bernard Baruch-

[Financier and presidential adviser]

It is possible do you think to be speaking and observing everything at the same time?

Is it possible to fully listen to someone while preparing your response to them?

Ideally, we need pauses in between speaking and responding to have the best communication. Why do you think that is? Can you think of someone who does that? Is it easier to communicate with them?

Nowadays, the relentless pace of life creates a pressure to keep the conversation flowing, but at what cost? Unfortunately, in our rush to keep up, the quality of our interactions is often sacrificed.

How much are we using all of our senses while we are speaking? By being mindful of all our senses, we can enhance our communication skills and improve our ability to understand and connect with others.

If you make listening and observation your occupation, you will gain much more than you can by talk.”

– Robert Baden-Powell-

[Boy Scouts Association]

So, we have to be able to see and observe while we are in a conversation, as much as we speak and it takes a lot of concentration to be an active listener!

I can help you or someone else with this by providing a safe and supportive environment to learn and grow. I will listen, guide and encourage to develop the skills and confidence to become a more effective listener and communicator.

I invite you to try this for free! Choose a time that best works for you HERE

“Of all the skills of leadership, listening is the most valuable — and one of the least understood. Most captains of industry listen only sometimes, and they remain ordinary leaders. But a few, the great ones, never stop listening. That’s how they get word before anyone else of unseen problems and opportunities.”

-Peter Nulty-

[Fortune Magazine]

I will leave you with that thought and will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes for your success,

korinne-sig

Korinne Le Page

LinkedIn 

Thought for the Week – The Power of Showing Up

power-of-showing-upLast week’s Thought for the Week was; “A Life Less Ordinary” about the incredible Darren Robson who left such a powerful legacy. He most definitely lived a life less ordinary and empowered so many others to do that too, myself included.

You can see this and all of my previous blogs HERE.

Darren was a down to earth guy and people felt relaxed in his company, while at the same time, he wanted to get to know them and always saw the best in everyone he met.

As you know, I’m a coach and also run  a number of programmes around Communication. My last couple of posts have been around ‘proximity’ and how we become the people we spend most of our time with.  So, what has this got to do with Communication?

Well, I believe that it’s all about how we ‘show up’ when we are with other people and yes, that may be different depending on who we are with! And how they show up with us to some degree.

Life can be so challenging sometimes when you just want to pull up the covers in the morning, burrow deeper into your mattress, and hide away from it all. This is precisely why showing up is such a big deal.

And here’s the thing …

Do we decide how we will be with others depending first on how they are with us? If we do that, who is in control? And it’s not that we want to have control over others, ideally we want to remain equal to them. And that is communication in itself.

So, of course we want to spend most of our time around those we are most comfortable with, can be ourselves and feel good.

At the same time, when we are around those who we feel less comfortable with, do we have to change the way we are? Of course not. If we do, then we’re just perpetuating this circle of potential conflict.

 

“The energy we show up with is more often than not the energy we encounter”. –Rasheed Ogunlaru-

[Author of the book Soul Trader – Putting the Heart Back into Your Business]

 

If we ‘show up’ the same way with everyone, every time, what have we got to lose?

According to Jeffrey Fry (Author of ‘Distilled Thoughts’), the formula for success is 2% talent, 8% luck, and 90% of showing up every day.

How do you show up every day with everyone?

 

Instead of showing up to let everyone know how great we are, show up to find out how great everyone else is.

-Simon Sinek-

[Author and Inspirational Speaker]

 

I will leave you with that thought and will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

*|FNAME|*, if you would like to explore this further with me, I would love to hear from you. You can choose a time that best works for you HERE 

With best wishes for your success,
signature-cropped

Korinne Le Page

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Thought for the Week – A Life Less Ordinary

life-less-ordinary-2

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “Why Your Circle Shapes Your Success”

This was about the Power of Proximity and how those we spend the most time with have a huge influence on us and our moods, our outlook and the expectations we have of ourselves and others.

You can see this and all of my previous blogs below.

And here is an example of the Power of Proximity in action …

I just heard some very sad news and still reeling from it. A friend who was also such an inspiration to me, and so many others, has passed away suddenly. Darren Robson was in incredible visionary Entrepreneur and Founder of the Moe Foundation and on the Global Board of the Association for Coaching.

Moe stands for: Me, Others and Everyone and that sums up what the Foundation is all about. People choose how much they want to pay and when people cannot pay, they are gifted a place.

Through his Foundation, so far, Darren has gifted £3 million pounds worth of Coaching Training and support to people from all walks of life. It all started with “The Dream Factory” for young people to help them realise their dreams. The Moe Programmes evolved and are literally life-changing – and you probably wouldn’t believe that unless you had been through one of them.

Darren was very open about his humble beginnings and losing his mother while he was still young and he and his brother started the Moe Foundation as a tribute to her. Their vision was to help less-fortunate younger people and then it evolved to helping everyone.

I first met Darren when I went through one of his Coaching Programmes and that was such a profound experience for me that it changed the way I work with people, whether it be Coaching, Training, with colleagues and in all I do.

Darren wasn’t a Trainer himself; he has an incredible team of people out there making his vision happen. I was one of the people who co-ran 15 courses in Guernsey and became a lead trainer on the Moe Certified Coaching Programme. The programme is profound. It was gifted to Darren by Carol Wilson and based on self-directed learning and awareness, which is where all the magic happens with Coaching.

So, I believe that if it wasn’t for Darren, I wouldn’t be doing what I do right now in the way I am doing it. I have written before about how one person / leader can have such a profound and positive effect on someone, possibly without realising how much.

Since I heard the terrible news, I have been pondering on all of this. And when we lose someone, we think about the last time we spoke to them and the conversation we had don’t we!

I hadn’t spoken to Darren for a while and I really wish I had. We can get so busy and absorbed in our lives that when we lose someone, we regret that gap of time since we showed them how much we appreciate them.

As all the tributes to Darren pour in, I wonder how many of us actually told him what an amazing human he was while he was here.

So, I take this opportunity to share this with you, so you can take this chance to appreciate those who have made the biggest impact on your life by letting them know how much they mean to you.

“Crazy is not following your dream and living a life less ordinary!

-Darren Robson-

[Founder of the Moe Foundation, DRArete.

Title in his own words: “Chief Storyteller / Firestarter”]

And Darren leaves us with the most incredible legacy that will continue for many years to come.

I will leave you with that thought and will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes for your success,

korinne-sig

LinkedIn 

Thought for the Week – Why Your Circle Shapes Your Success!

circlesLast week’s Thought for the Week was; “Who Will you Ride with in the Limo?” This was about spending most of our time, whenever we can, with those who accept us for who we are, inspire us, help us grow and we can be ourselves with.

You can see this and all of my previous blogs below.

  • Whether you are an Entrepreneur who is at the seed stage or your business is growing into something amazing and taking off;
  • Whether you are an Executive, Manager, Team Leader or Team Member working for a larger organisation;
  • Whether you are an independent Consultant or other Professional …

In all cases, to succeed, you will have to grow your network, accept challenges, take risks, be ready to learn from your mistakes and keep the ball rolling.

And asking for help is vital to growing your business and career.

Yet, many professional people are hesitant to seek the help they need. Asking for assistance doesn’t make us less capable – we want to be able to go to colleagues and / or seniors for support. 

Some will say that coaches and mentors are the only way forward, they are impartial and extremely convenient. And … if you have the right Coach or Mentor, they will ride on the bus with you if the limo breaks down! (You will recognise that from last week).

Working with the right Coach or Mentor can only add to you achieving the success you are striving for. What’s the difference between Coaching and Mentoring? Read HERE

[Yes, I am a Coach … at the same time this post is not about selling Coaching]

In any case, in the same vein as last week’s thought, you want to surround yourself with talented people!

One of the most profound things I have learned as an entrepreneur and through working with business professionals is this;

“Hire people to work with you who show the most talent and drive and who may even be smarter than you!”

There’s humility and wisdom in that and, let’s face it; no matter how good you are at building and running a company, you can’t do it all by yourself.

Have you ever heard someone say; “You are who you hang out with?” If you have kids, you probably worry about them falling in with the wrong crowd (and your parents worried about the same for you!).

That’s because those we spend the most time with have a huge influence on us and our moods, how we view the World and the expectations we have of ourselves and others.

This is known as “The Power of Proximity”

So, why don’t we use this it to our own advantage?

When we surround ourselves with positivity, we’re more likely to adopt empowering beliefs and see life as happening for us, rather than to us. 

Just as we benefit when we surround ourselves with people who make us unhappy, sadly we suffer when those in our business or social circles are negative or narrow-minded.

So, we need to frequently remind ourselves that who we spend the most time with is who we eventually become. And, to reach new heights of success, we must surround ourselves with people who not only inspire us, but also challenge us in a positive way. It isn’t always easy, but it’s worth it.

I mentioned a few weeks back that, when I was in a leadership role in the British Airways Training Department, I found an operational manager difficult to be around. Only by arranging to have a coffee and chat did we find common ground and that resulted in an extremely positive and empowering partnership for both of us.

Of course, it doesn’t always work out like that. If not, then we have to navigate our way to be around those positive and inspiring people as much as possible. And this could be online as much as in person.

If you want to know more about this, here’s a good read: “The Proximity Principle” by Ken Coleman.

If you want to turn your goals into reality faster, then get yourself in proximity with people who are playing the game at a higher level than you do.”

-Tony Robbins-

If you would like to try coaching with me, I invite you to book a free consultation with me to see if we are a good fit. You can choose a time that best works for you HERE 

So, I hope you have a great week and I will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” – you can download it HERE

With best wishes for your success,

korinne-sig

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Thought for the Week – Who Will you Ride with in the Limo?

limoLast week’s Thought for the Week was; A Chrysalis for Transformation about how loneliness can be a time to transform and grow and also knowing when we need to be around other people.

You can see this and all of my previous blogs below.

So, this week, I’d like to pick up on the bit; “being around other people” and, ideally, this will be the right people in any given moment when we need connection.

And yes, we don’t always have a choice to be around the people we would choose to be with do we and we have to make the best of that!

What we can do though is to spend most of our time, whenever we can, with those who inspire us and who we can be ourselves with. You will already be choosing to talk to certain people and or groups in different situations.

“Surround yourself with people who are going to lift you higher”

-Oprah Winfrey-

You will know about The Pareto Principle. If not, here’s a brief explanation …

“The Pareto principle, also known as the 80/20 rule, is a theory maintaining that 80 percent of the output from a given situation or system is determined by 20 percent of the input. The principle doesn’t stipulate that all situations will demonstrate that precise ratio – it refers to a typical distribution”.

In the case of surrounding ourselves with the right people, there will be around 20% who inspire approximately 80% of our output and around 80% who contribute to approximately 20% of our output.

Just like spending 20% of our time and energy on those activities that generate 80% of our income and / or output.

All-too-often when we are less-productive, we are probably spending 80% of our time and energy on the activities that generate only 20% of our income and / or output.

When it comes to choosing the people I want to spend most of my time with, this quote hits the nail on the head …

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down”.

-Oprah Winfrey-

If you’d like to book a free consultation with me to talk about anything that’s holding you back, you can choose a time that best works for you HERE 

So, I hope you have a great week and I will be in touch again soon with more thoughts and tips.

With best wishes,

korinne-sig

Thrive Coaching & TrainingEmpowering you to Thrive!

P.S. Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” – you can download it HERE

Thrive Web Site

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Thought for the Week – A Chrysalis for Transformation

butterfly

Last week’s Thought for the Week was; “One Intention, Endless Magic!”. This was about how it is absolutely possible to achieve the most amazing things when we put our mind to it by setting a powerful intention!

You can see this and all of my previous blogs below.

This week, I popped into a local café for a quick coffee and bumped into a friend who I hadn’t seen for a while. She is an entrepreneur and has had coaching with me in the past. She was working from there that day because she was finding working from home can get a bit lonely.

It’s true isn’t it. I have found that myself at times when I have worked at home and feel the urge to go to a place where there are people around and a stimulating buzz going on!

Sometimes, we do want that peace and quiet when we want to concentrate and get our head down on something.

And at other times, we can actually feel lonely when we are around other people! We are all different and it’s about checking in with ourselves to see what we need in that moment.

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about how taking time alone to think can help us to reconnect with ourselves and having time alone can be a very positive thing.

At the same time, I know that loneliness is something that often comes up with professional people, especially as many of us are now working more from home. So, here’s a quote to ponder on …

“A season of loneliness and isolation is when the caterpillar gets its wings. Remember that next time you feel alone.” 

-Mandy Hale-

[Known around the world as “The Single Woman.” In just over three years, Mandy has garnered a massive Twitter following of a half a million people from across the globe].

And a butterfly is symbolic of transformation and growth right?

By the way, my friend in the coffee shop found that talking about her loneliness in that moment completely changed her frame of mind.

*|FNAME|*, if you’d like to book a time to chat, you can choose a time that best works for you HERE 

So, I hope you have a great week – let the wind get beneath your wings and fly!

With best wishes,

korinne-sig

P.s. Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” – you can download it HERE

Thought for the Week – One Intention, Endless Magic!

magicLast week’s Thought for the Week was; Mind-boggling Fortitude about the incredible achievements that human beings make through sheer mindset, courage determination and fortitude. You can see this and all of my previous blogs here in my blog.

If I ask you what is the most amazing thing you have achieved so far in your life, what would that be?

When I ask people that same question on training workshops, often they struggle to think of anything. And yet they find it easier to say what that have not achieved that they think they should have!

Why is that?

Because many people are conditioned to be humble and don’t want to appear “full of themselves” and things like that.

Of course, humility is a good quality to have and many of the most successful people are actually quite humble about their achievements. At the same time, they seem to quietly acknowledge them while playing them down a little don’t they!

There is a very subtle difference between playing down what we have achieved and beating ourselves up about what we have not yet achieved – right?

Did you see what I did there? Yes, I emphasised the “Yet”!

So, a little shift in our mindset can change everything – and then setting our intentions.

If you look back on your life and what you have achieved, what was your intention leading up to that?

How did you put that intention into words?

Sometimes people interpret their intention into some kind of image or vision, especially if they are more of a visual person (if you know about Neuro Linguistic Programming – NLP – you will get that).

For others, it could be a piece of music that reminds them of their intention.

Here’s a definition from the Dictionary:

What is the true meaning of intention?

“An intention is idea that you plan (or intend) to carry out. If you mean something, it’s an intention. Your goal, purpose, or aim is your intention. It’s something you mean to do, whether you pull it off or not”.

So, your intention will be like a goal – at the same time, your intention / goal has to be very meaningful to you, like an anchor that keeps you on track towards where you want to get to.

Like Bob Wieland (who I spoke about last week), how can we achieve such amazing feats in our lives?

We know that it is absolutely possible when we put our mind to it through setting our own powerful intention!

 

“Intentions compressed into words enfold magical power”

-Deepaki Chopra-

[Medical Doctor and writer]

 

If you’d like to book a FREE consultation with me – you can choose your slot HERE 

Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” and you can download it HERE

So, I hope you have a great week and achieve something amazing, no matter how big or how tiny!

With best wishes,

korinne-sig

Korinne Le Page

LinkedIn 

Thought for the Week – Mind-boggling Fortitude

fortitudeLast week’s Thought for the Week was; “Reading the Room” about how the most impactful people are those who listen and read the room. They may say just one thing in a meeting and yet that one thing is the most powerful thing anyone has to say!

You can see all of my previous blogs below.

One of the most impressive people I ever met was Bob Wieland who did a talk when I was living and running training courses in Barbados.  Bob is a Vietnam war veteran who lost both legs to a mortar mine in 1969. He lost them right up to hip level. Of course, we know of many more who have suffered such losses, past and present, some losing all four limbs.

Despite his horrific injuries, Bob became inspired to do a marathon and is the only double amputee to finish the challenging Kona, Hawaiian Ironman race without a wheelchair. He “ran” across America on his hands, taking 3 years, eight months and six days to travel from coast-to-coast. And, over his lifetime Bob has finished many marathons.

He spoke about those who were with him on the race (most able-bodied) and how some of them dropped out. At the same time, he was so humble about that explaining that everyone had their own reasons and he had so much respect for them.

Chatting to Bob after the talk, I was struck by how humble he was, and yet he overcame adversity with such incredible grace and courage. He also finished the NYC Marathon on 98 hours and you can see him cross the finish line here: https://youtu.be/csBt2_L5yTc

I don’t know about you, but I find this such a mind-blowingly impressive tribute to human beings and what we can achieve through sheer mindset, courage determination and fortitude.

What does this tell us as we go about our day?

“Like tiny seeds with potent power to push through tough ground and become mighty trees, we hold innate reserves of unimaginable strength. We are resilient.”
-Catherine DeVrye, The Gift of Nature-

[Best-selling author, winner of Australian Executive Woman of the Year and a Thought Leader]

 So, I hope you have a great week and achieve something wonderful, no matter how big or small.

With best wishes,

korinne-sig

Download this FREE Checklist; “The Ultimate Checklist for Mastering Communication” and you can download it HERE

If you’d like to book a FREE consultation with me – you can choose your slot HERE 

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